Changing Time

         Have you ever imagined, how fast can a normal day fall into the list of the most horrendous days of your life. You wake up in the morning expecting everything to be fine and go ahead with your daily routine but end up with an anti-climax.

         That day too started so well even I expected it to be not more than a normal mundane day. Woke up after ten snooze, dragged myself to the loo with a bad hangover and their again slept off for another ten minutes. A glance at the watch and then started the running process, I ran out to catch a bus though I knew I won’t make it to the interview.


         With i-pod plugged in my head I sat in one corner of the bus, blocking myself from the world. The bus stopped suddenly with a bang, I was pretty sure it was an accident and time to scoot. I got out of the bus saw a glimpse of two people lying on the road, the couple looks pretty old, never even bothered to check what exactly happened. Here comes another bus, I don't want to take a chance, quickly jumped into it. I noticed a guy staring at me, an old man in his late 60's or 70's, sitting in a corner. His face looks peaceful but his eyes spoke a lot. His looks made me feel guilty for not helping the old couple. But I'm helpless, this interview is more important for me. As I reached my stop I got off from my seat gave a quick glance at the old guy, he kept staring at me. With no time to bother, I walked off.


         Somehow I managed to reach on time.  Gave my best shot and got through the interview. I walked out with the confidence to face the world. After several failed attempts, it’s my time to prove my parents I'm not worthless. I'll make a fortune out of my life. Phone started ringing breaking the silence of my day dream.


'Hello…hello…where are you?'
 ’Hello Uncle! What happened? Why you sound so tensed?'
'It's hard for me to explain... (weeping) Your dad...he ...he is no more... (weeping)  met with an accident today, come to CM hospital urgently'


Beep... Beep…


Couldn't take the shock, I got frozen. The world came to an end with a deafening silence.


 My dad would have been alive now, if only one of the passengers took him to hospital  but then it was his fate to bleed to death in the middle of a rushy road. I could never walk pass by any accident ruthlessly how I used to be after my dad's death. Whenever I see someone in accident I see my dad lying on the road pleading for help. I can't change the world, but can change myself. Nothing is more important than saving a life.


Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does
-William James

Never bothered to be bothered

                                      In this busy world where everyone's world revolves around money and lust, we forget many things, many relations, and many commitments too. Things that are priceless turns out to be the most unimportant ones and we are never even bothered to think about it. The robotic age has turned man itself to robots where everyone is working on a set of rules, with just one goal,  "make money and die for it". Even though it’s monotonous and mundane, we still run behind it. More than a race, it’s a means of survival…"survival of the fittest". Hmmm... now let me start my story...

       College days...yes I know what you're thinking...'the most amazing days' right? Well true,friends...and friends...and friends. I was no different from a typical college student, least botherations and tensions. Flicking money from Dad's pocket to bunking classes, watching all crap movies  that too first day first show,getting drunk and dancing with the worst steps literally making a fool out of me,spontaneous decisions and trips to nowhere  and everywhere ,running behind those annoying lecturers for attendance shortage,finally going crazy with the huge bundle of photostats and notes on the eve of the university exam,sleepless nights and sleepy exams.


       Every day was a happening day for me,being a social person my friends circle was vast and I believed then that they were my life.

      It was during my post graduation I met her. She was never a beauty to praise like poets do. But she's someone different,crazy, fun loving, caring, reliable, short tempered, stubborn and  a great friend too. A Perfectly Unique blend! That's what attracted me to her but I always wondered what made her fall in love with me.  We were never like the usual couples with long night chats,staring into eyes for hours and all those kinda cheesy stuff. 


        We both were busy setting our career and life, but somewhere down the line, I got carried away with my career and had to move on. I never really bothered to think about how hard that must have been for her. After 4 years, I saw her again, a happily married woman who threw her successful career for her family which she considers to be precious than her career.I wondered why she did it.

    Being a 24x7 professional, I was completely caught in the wicked web of life, where I thought I was comfortable and happy. My world was all about work, money, parties, fame and girls. Stressful days and boozed nights replaced my best friends. When my love threw her life for her family, I threw my family for my life. I never bothered about anyone; I guess the only person I loved and was bothered about was me, myself. 

    I still remember that dreadful day, a severe pain in my head, I felt like my head was tearing apart, I tried calling someone for help but before I could do something I lost my conscious. The next thing I know was I'm hospitalized. I could faintly hear someone calling me,slowly I opened my eyes saw my Dad standing next to my bed,couldn't figure out what was going around me and why was I chained to those beeping machines. But somewhere in the silence of the ICU I heard two nurses whispering,"yes, the result is positive, his tumor is cancerous". For a second, I prayed that shouldn't be me. As days passed I realized my prayers were in vain. 

        
      My life completely turned upside down, stressful days turned out to bed ridden days, painful nights replaced my boozed party nights. People I valued least are the only ones I have now. 


      This time it wasn't me who rode the steering of my life but was that unexpected friend who been following me all this while. He is waiting to grab my soul and eat my body. But before I go, I want to thank him, because he opened my blind eyes,if he hadn't made this entry I would have never bothered to find my Dad's love, Mom's care and Sissy's pamper. My years are over,months are over all I've is a few more days or may be God knows a few more hours. It’s insane to think about turning back time but I wish I had some more time.

I guess this time God is not bothered...

Friend for life till death

       0opz! I am late again.This time I am not worried about it because I know it’s the perfect time to let go all my pain...all my feelings...all my memories... forever. His mouth filled with poison entered into me breaking each layer of my skin and with immense pleasure I enjoyed him for the last time and like a devil it rushed into my vein;a feel of heaviness in my head,pain started throbbing in my nerves. 

               It was my craze that brought him to my life but slowly he possessed my heart and painted my days with delusion. Yes, I kissed the vicious lips of addiction...fell into his inescapable hands.That numbness spread into my blood and to my life.

           Complicated life kept on confusing me and left me with embarrassment and bewilderment. And like a rescuer, he came again inducing a streak of wildness and took me to another realm where I lost myself in the halo of hallucination.The light of realization struck me late. But by then I was caught in the evil web beautifully woven by fate. I wished I could go back. There I saw him again wearing the hat of a life saver, started pumping my veins, this time not with drugs but with medicines. He tried hard to bring me back to life but I was stuck in the afterglow of illusion. 

            Flashes of memories passing by like a film reel. Who knew a silly syringe can change life upside down. Here I am with no hopes waiting for that moment of stillness. I knew only he can redeem me form this sickening life.There were days I used to swirl in pleasure but now I am in pain, ready to face death. I can feel death inching in me. My hands started weakening and I dropped him, my best worst friend. Like a free fall I fell down, I knew this is it!! 

For the last time I looked at the syringe which changed my life...